Letters to HumanistSG is a column where we reply to appeals for advice/help from non-religious individuals.
| To the Humanist Society, My dad is terminally ill. The doctors have given him 3 more months to live. My dad is an atheist and he does not believe there is life after death. However, I can see that he is sometimes afraid of what’s coming for him, and worried about the loved ones he’s going to live behind. I do not know what else I can do to comfort him. He does not want any prayers, nor any evangelisation attempts, in his final days. Can you help? Sincerely, YT (Real name is redacted for privacy) |
Our reply
Dear YT,
I’m deeply sorry to hear about your dad’s condition.
This is an incredibly challenging time, and your desire to comfort him without resorting to religious approaches shows a great deal of respect for his wishes.
In these final months, the most valuable thing you can do is to be present and attentive. Spend time listening to his concerns, fears, and memories.
Engaging in conversations about his life, the things he’s proud of, and the relationships he’s cherished can be very comforting. This helps affirm the meaning and value of his life.
Encourage him to express his thoughts and feelings openly. Sometimes, articulating worries and fears can provide a sense of relief.
Assist him in settling his affairs if he wishes, and reassure him that his loved ones will be taken care of.
Don’t worry if you don’t have the answers for him. The goal is to help him find his own sense of closure and reassurance.
Your presence and empathy can offer profound comfort, helping him to feel valued and loved in his final days.
